Making Myself Fit In
by maggalina
Summary: Tom Marvolo Riddle is just trying to fit in. He doesn't want to be called crazy anymore. And NO ONE will laugh at him again.


The city rang with noise as the New Year was called in. 1930 was going to be a year to remember. Everyone in London was celebrating. Everyone that is except one little boy. Tom Marvolo Riddle had just turned three, literally twenty-four hours ago. He was still awake at midnight because no one had bothered to put him to bed. Mrs. Cole had broken into the liquor early and none of the older kids cared about him.

When he told them his teddy had talked to him they had just told him he was crazy and they had ignored him ever since. He knew it had talked to him though. Maybe he was crazy, but what did crazy even mean? It was too much for the little three year old boy to handle. He decided that if he didn't want to be crazy he would have to ignore his teddy. Even though it was the only thing he cared about, and that cared about him in turn, and start acting like the older children.

He saw Martha laugh at Jimmy so he laughed at Jimmy, he didn't want to laugh at Jimmy but Martha wasn't crazy so he had to laugh at Jimmy. No one was going to call him crazy again. He just wanted everyone to like him. All he wanted to do was fit in and not be laughed at.

The children at the orphanage were not disciplined and so no one behaved. Whenever someone was hurt all anyone did was laugh. So that is what Tom did. Eventually he stopped emulating the other children and just made fun of them on his own, it was what everyone did and he didn't realize it was making it so no one liked him, he didn't realize no one at the orphanage liked each other, all they did was fit in. And so Tom Riddle made it so he would fit in.

As he grew older not only did no one like him but he no longer fit in either. He did not just laugh at people; he made those who laughed at him suffer. Sometimes the three year old he once was tried to tell him it wasn't nice but what did he know, he had never fit in. All Tom had wanted was for people to accept him. Little Tom was ignored because everyone who tried to be nice at the orphange was ignored.

Eventually that side of Tom went away completely, leaving him a very different person from who he might have been if he had ever taken the time to listen. He did what he had to do to be accepted but it hadn't worked. He had taken it too far but was past caring. So he strung up the kid's rabbit, it was no big deal. He had laughed at him and told him he was crazy for going outside to 'talk' to the snakes. They didn't understand the weird noises he was making, he was just crazy. Tom had accepted that they would call him that, but he would not let it be unjustified. He would do the things they called him crazy for, and he would make them suffer with them.

He had moulded himself to be like them and now he was just too good at their game. That was hardly his fault. He had long given up on the idea that anyone would like him or that he would ever fit it. But he was not to be laughed at. New children learned that soon enough and he was sure to teach the old ones again if they ever forgot.

By the time he turned eleven he had forgotten the sweet boy he used to be and so had everyone else. He had changed completely, just for acceptance. When he couldn't get that anymore he settled for respect out of fear. The little three year old cuddling his teddy was buried deep within but perhaps if someone at this new Hogwarts tried, he could come out again. Alas the Slytherins were just like the children at the orphanage. He was from muggle London? He must be trash. And they laughed at him. And so Tom had to prove himself to be more powerful than all of them.

There was no chance of him changing back. He was the little boy forced to grow up too fast. The little boy starved for love and so sought comfort where he could find it. Tom loved power and nothing else because that is all he could get. With his magic, parseltongue, and heritage he would no longer be worthless. He had changed for the better. He would always have respect.

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Beta'ed by the wonderful MrsBates93


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